Saturday, January 5, 2013
Well, as Pop would say, I ain't had this much fun since the hogs ate my little brother. He was good at that. Always making light in every situation, and bringing humor into each and every one of our lives. And that is exactly what he would want us to do today.
For those of you that don't know me, my name is Felisha. I am the daughter of Dale and Lesa Nolan, and the youngest grandchild of Dwain and Theoma Ingram, or as most people know them, Pop and Grandma.
Pop had a bit of an ornery streak in him. It was a streak that lasted about 78 years. He was always quick and most of the time you had to listen real close to catch his, as many refer, Dwainisms. He never did it for the attention, he simply wanted you to laugh and to feel comfortable.
So, show of hands, who here has ever won against Pop in a board game? Anyone? I didn't think so. You had to keep your eye on him. He could cheat his way through an eye exam. But no one could get mad at him. He just sat there with that innocent look that slowly turned into his ornery grin once you finally caught on. He was the sneakiest person I have ever met. And it wasn't just with games. Every time we ate at his favorite restaurant, The Golden Corral, yes, really. He would simply slip a handful or two of M&M's into his pocket. He was saving them for later.
That man loved his M&M's. He would buy the peanut ones by the pounds, and his only complaint about them was that they were so hard to peel. Those big yellow bags were always "hidden" somewhere in the house, but we all managed to "sniff" them out somehow. The pantry, the cereal cabinet, the cookie drawer. Oh yeah, Pop's infamous cookie drawer. When Pop and Grandma moved into their current house, Pop conveniently chose the only two kid height drawers for all his cookies, and all of us kids knew it. Pop truly enjoyed pointing every kid to those drawers, and I'm sure mostly because he knew he was passing on his orneriness.
Pop never preferred to just go out and buy something. Partly because he was a tad bit tight, but mostly because he believed in fixing stuff or making it yourself. And he was good at it, mostly. Pop made the best bread you could find, and you could sure smell it when you opened his front door. Now those Krustez oat bran muffins, those are a whole other story. He would bake those muffins to the point of borderline charred. But if you commented on the way they were cooked, he would simply reply, "Because that's the way I like them." In the past couple years, Pop decided he was going to plant some tomatoes in his backyard. And not just anywhere in the backyard, right smack dab in the middle. Here, here, here.
Recently, Grandma and Pop purchased a new car. In a very unfortunate event, the electronic key wouldn't open the locked doors because the battery had died. Instead of waiting for a locksmith, Pop decided to just knock out the back window. He could fix this problem. And when the dealership couldn't get any way to prevent this from happening again, Pop fixed it. He rigged a piece of fishing line to the door lock that ran up through the window. You sure couldn't use that door, but he was never going to get locked out again. Speaking of cars, Pop loved to clean windshields. Family trips were often delayed until he got the windshield washed. He would chase you out of the driveway with a roll of paper towels and a can of Sprayaway window cleaner.
The most dangerous thing Pop ever got was a 4-wheel drive pickup. Who cares if they moved highway 27 and took the bridge out over Ladder Creek. He could go ANYWHERE with 4-wheel drive!
Pop lived his life to the fullest in every way. If he wanted to do something or go somewhere, he would make it happen. Nothing stood in his way, he was determined to say the least. All except one thing; his quest for lost treasure. For years, Pop collected and read the magazine "Lost Treasure." You could always find a pile by his favorite chair. He found all sorts of arrowheads, rocks, even a meteorite and a Calvary button, but he would never buy a metal detector. Despite his numerous hours of research into each and every brand and model.
There were very few days that you couldn't find Pop dressed in an old Southern Sky t-shirt, his house shoes, ankle weights, and any one of his 777 pairs of glasses from his glass bowl. And if you asked him what he was doing, he was mildewing. When you could finally get Pop to slow down for a nap, he had that TV remote attached to his left hand. For some reason his finger tapped down on the volume up button so much that he would wake himself up from the TV getting so loud. What you couldn't find with Pop was his cell phone; that old Motorola flip phone with the antenna that you could pull up, which by the way had the best service. And maybe I should re-phrase. Pop may have had his cell phone with him, but he would shut it off until he decided he needed it.
Does anyone remember Swipe? How bout thin oil? We all sure do. Swipe was this miracle cleaner that was gonna make Pop rich and thin oil was gonna make everyone skinny. Pop swore it could fix any ailment you had. Well, needless to say, Pop still farmed for a living, I'm sure we still have a few cases of Swipe hanging around, and we are all still looking for that miracle diet.
We could keep you here for hours retelling stories about Pop, but there was nothing he hated more than a long service, right Mark?
Although Pop kept us laughing non-stop, his true passions were family and music. He was a selfless musician that went above and beyond to make sure each one of us had every opportunity to play an instrument, even if it meant driving us countless hours for lessons. I don't think anything made him happier than listening to his family play music. He loved it. I found a quote by Roy Ayers that might just melt your butter, as Pop would say. "The true beauty of music is that it connects people. It carries a message, and we, the musicians, are the messengers."
